As the academic year draws to a close, (in fact, I'm already done with it) it's but natural one would look back in retrospection trying to introspect and draw inferences and chuckle at memories and whine for ill-made decisions and opportunities missed. Given the utter joblessness suddenly jabbed on me, (exams over .. sometimes I think exams are good .. at least you have something to do all the time.. something to focus upon) I too am going to do the same.
"What a year!" .. of all people, no KGPian could deny that. Starting with a blanket ban on bikes, followed by the 11 PM ban, then Illumination, a drab placement season, number of open houses - highly charged ones, 22/3 and finally just before the end of the session - 23/4. It would certainly go down as one of the lowest 12 months in kgp.
On a personal front, apart from every one of those mentioned above affecting me, there were a few other highs and lows too. Bhai beginning his college; the internship-interview season; a poor start in Tech-GC; bro getting in finals of an all-India level exhibition; You know what (mmm .. ok .. i desperately want to write about this point but don't want to write about it - quite a contradicting quandary. hence, just 'you know what'); Midas - our robotic hand getting successfully implemented; an almost funded project which didn't take off :( ; the excitement of friends getting great offers from universities and companies alike; GRE - a disaster; the hall (and general) elections and then finally 23/4 - which hit me bad!
All in all, a session with not-so-many goods and predominantly a grim one. Particularly towards the end when the whole campus simmered with 22/3. Phul Tempo's critical condition was no less disconcerting (Thank GOD he's back in nice shape). A guy disappearing all together - and is still not found. Another falling off the roof and losing a terrible amount of blood. And finally, the nail in the coffin - 23/4 - Ramanand deciding to end his life. In particular, Tempo and Ramanand's were the cases which had the deepest impact on me 'coz I knew them personally. I would not want to go into any kind of speculation as to what led to Ramanand taking such a drastic step. It's only that you feel a strange emptiness, a guilt (for a reason you cannot fathom). The fact that he was my lab partner last semester fuels the disquietude. It makes one think - is life really that fragile. That one quality, the mystic aura which separates the living from the dead and the non-living .. is it so vulnerable? If it is, it certainly shouldn't be. Or there shouldn't be any life at all. Why subject humanity to this pain?
Life and death - the only two absolute truths in this world, and we are not even close to knowing what they mean; leave alone understanding the why's and how's.
Don't want to write further on this.
PS1: Life moves on
PS2: Busy with an application thing these days ..
PS3: Finally, Final Year .. I really want it to be over fast
PS4: Song of the day - "Pal" - KK
PS5: Reading 'Freakonomics' .. Initial review - go, read it!
PS6: Wonder if I'd be able to get enough internet access during internship
PS7: hmmm .. woke at 12 in the night, went out for a chit-chat with a friend, and now this blog - 5 am .. exams over - hell yeah!!
Forever Is A Lie
7 years ago
3 Comments:
How shall you find the secret of death unless you seek it in the heart of life?
if you would indeed beholden the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life.
For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.
And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then you shall truly dance.
PS: KGP is awesome. You are going to miss it.
then why let the river run its course .. if the ultimate goal is to lose its entity in the vast salinity, why go to all that trouble .. there lies the subtle, but the most vital difference .. life .. thou could allow that river born in those high mountains to come down along that difficult path to the sea .. but why inflict the trouble on the life it sustains ..
the philosophy of embracing death to understand life - is one which we have come to associate with almost every of those extremes of existence.. say, embrace the spirit of losing to know the joy of winning; survive the bastion of grief and depression and you shall dance in exalted joy when happy.. but I say, with the rest, you have a chance of winning after losing .. you have a scope to live through those happy moments after you experience sorrow .. but death?? death doesn't let u live anymore to know what life is ..
and plzz .. don't even talk about experiencing anything vicariously ..
PS: I know KGP is awesome .. everyone says so .. I want to feel it .. I really want to
Hi,
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I liked the style and the presentation of your write-ups, and just wanted to enquire, if you shall be interested to write for our e-zine.
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Keep the good work up....keep posting
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